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Make Allowance for Each Other’s Faults (Ephesians 4:2)

How to handle the faults of others

How do you react towards the faults of others? What about when they hurt you physically or emotionally? What if their fault came at a cost to you? In Ephesians 4:2, we find three fruits of the Spirit to tell us how we should handle the faults of others. This verse tells us that we should be humble, gentle, and patient with the faults of others.

Humility, Gentleness, and patience is the response to faults

Living with humility, gentleness, and patience is hard… but why? Here are three reasons this is difficult:

  1. Because we always tend to look out for ourselves. Our human nature tends to lean toward self-protection and our natural reaction to being wronged or hurt is to put our defenses and demand retribution.
  2. We point our finger at other people’s faults so that our faults don’t look that bad. If we can show the other person in a worse light than ourselves, then everyone’s attention will be on the bigger fault of the other person and we can keep ours tucked away, unseen or at least forgotten.
  3. We place the blame on their faults so that we don’t have to feel guilty for our own. None of us like the feeling of knowing we are guilty. So when tensions arise in relationships, we look for where we can blame others to either justify our own actions or so that we can say, “I might have been wrong, but not as wrong as she was!”

We are all guilty of faults

The only problem with all three of these excuses is that God sees and knows everything. He doesn’t look at our sin and compare it with the person next to us. To Him, sin is sin. It doesn’t come in Small, Medium, Large, and Extra Large. We are all guilty because the Bible says that “All have sinned.” 

So if God expects us to utilize these three Fruits of the Spirit as we encounter the faults of others, we need to understand what these three fruits mean and what they look like when we utilize them.

Responding to faults with humility

To  have humility is to be free from pride and arrogance. A humble person doesn’t need to pretend to be something they are not. It’s not about your ego. Rather than being self-centered, you are other-centered.  It is not thinking less of yourself, but thinking about yourself less. The less we think about ourselves, the more we can think about the needs of others or what they might be going through. The less we think about ourselves, the more time we have to pray for others.

When we live with humility we do not need to have all the focus on us. We are “other-driven”.  Consider how much time you think about yourself, pray for yourself, groom yourself, and complain to others about how your needs are not met or how someone has done you wrong. Now how much time do you spend worried about your spouse’s needs or your friend’s needs or your co-workers or boss’ needs. How much time to you spend concerned about your parents’ or children’s needs? How much time to spend praying for other people in your life? And how much time do you spend complaining about your pastor rather than praying for him? It’s time we

Responding to faults with Gentleness

Gentleness is the quality of being kind, tender, or mild-mannered. It does not mean being weak. Rather it is a polite and restrained behavior toward others. It is setting aside pride, arguing, resentment and anger and being willing to forgive the faults and offenses of others.  We need to remember our own offenses against God and that through his love, grace, and gentleness towards us, He forgives us – therefore, how can our response be anything less in regards to the faults and offenses of others?

Responding to faults with Patience

Patience is having the ability to endure – whether that is a tedious task, a trial, or an annoyance – without getting riled up. If a person is patient, he is able to remain calm, even when you’re stuck in rush hour traffic or you’ve been waiting in the drive=thru line or the check out line at the store much longer than you wanted.

The patient person can face afflictions, pain, toil, calamity, provocation, temptations, or other evils and remain calm. Their temper does not flare, you won’t hear them murmuring or complaining, and you’ll not see them acting fretful or anxious. Instead, the patient person will persevere through every situation, learn and grow from it, and bear the faults of others without malice, anger, resentment, or revenge. Consider for a moment the areas of life where you struggle with patience – is it in driving, at the office, with your spouse or children, attempting a difficult task?

People are not perfect – neither are you

Think for a moment the last time your ran up against the fault of another person. What was your reaction to their fault? In Matthew 26:34, Jesus tells Peter that on that very night before the rooster crows, Peter will deny that he knows Jesus. Because of His sovereignty, Jesus knew that Peter would do this even when He called him to be His disciple.  So from this we can learn that we should enter into relationships with the expectation that people are not perfect. They will mess up, make mistakes, let us down, disappoint, and even hurt us.

If we are honest with ourselves, then each one of us can also think about a time where we messed up, made a mistake, let someone down, disappointed someone, or hurt another person. For this reason, we should be willing to make allowance for the faults of others, especially when Jesus has forgiven us. Colossians 3:12-13 says, “Therefore, God’s chosen ones, holy and loved, put on heartfelt compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience,accepting one another and forgiving one another if anyone has a complaint against another. Just as the Lord has forgiven you, so you must also forgive.”

Focus on your own faults

If we concentrate on our own faults, we probably won’t have time and energy to be worrying about everyone else’s faults. As we admit and own up to our faults, we can then live patiently with others. Whether it’s with your spouse, co-workers, friends, family, or other drivers in rush hour traffic, how can you live humbly, with gentleness and patience today? Spend some time asking God to show you the areas that you are not humble, gentle and patient with others.

#faults #humility #patience #gentleness

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This book includes 365 daily activities and takes you on a guided journey through Biblical principles about Godly marriage that you can then apply to your marriage, as well as helping you talk through concepts that can help you develop a solid relationship. Inside you will find simple, quick activities that include:

  • Scripture to memorize and meditate on
  • Conversation Starters
  • Concepts from the Bible on Godly marriages
  • Romance Builders
  • Relationship Builders
  • Personal reflections
  • Date ideas
  • Group date ideas for you and other Christian couples

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Hopeless Sinner or Saved by Grace? (Ephesians 2:4-5)

Grace and Mercy over Justice

Richard J. Needham said, “Many of those who cry so loudly for justice would soon beg for mercy if justice were done to them.” When it comes to standing before God, I don’t know about you, but it’s mercy that I want – not justice. The Bible is clear that every one of us are sinners (Romans 3:23) and that the justice we deserve for our sins is death (Romans 6:23). If God were only a God of justice – none of us would have any hope. It is only by His grace and mercy that the invitation of salvation was given to us and Ephesians 2:4-5 tells us that we sinners are made acceptable by God’s grace and because of His love for us.

Our hopeless situation

hopless sinner screen bean

As sinners, we each find ourselves in a hopeless situation. One where we are spiritually dead and enslaved in our sin as we walk among the disobedient and under Satan’s dominion. As such, we are objects of God’ wrath and justice demands payment and the payment is a debt we are not able pay. It is impossible for us to do enough good works to change our hopeless situation. There is no amount of money large enough to donate to the church to buy you way into eternal life. There is absolutely nothing we sinful humans can do on our own to change the justice we deserve. On our own, our situation is hopeless.

But God is a God who turns hopelessness into abundant life. Here’s how…

God is Rich in Mercy and Grace

Mercy is simply God’s compassion for our hopeless and helpless situation and spares us from the justice we deserve. Instead, He shows pity, compassion, and kindness in that He made it possible for us to trade in our hopelessness for His abundant life. However, we must understand that God does not owe us mercy. In fact, mercy cannot be owed because it is given to someone who doesn’t deserve it.

Another aspect of God’s mercy, is that He is rich in mercy – or in other words, He is very patient with us. If God handed out justice immediately upon our first sin, none of us would every get passed our toddler years. Instead the holy and righteous God chooses to hold off pronouncing judgement to a later time to give us the chance to experience His mercy, repent of our sins, and accept Christ as our Savior. William Farley wrote in Outrageous Mercy: Rediscovering the Radical Nature of the Cross, “The cross displays God’s mercy and grace, and justice, and does so with startling clarity.” Because God’s wrath and mercy met at the cross of Christ who paid our sin debt for us, we can become a new creation and a child of God.

Mercy triumphs over justice, but if we choose to refuse God’s mercy, our hopelessness remains and instead of abundant life, we face eternal damnation. Rejecting God’s mercy is choosing justice and judgement instead. But if we reject what He freely offers, then we can expect to receive the justice and wages of our sin – eternal separation from God and an eternity in hell.

God’s Love is Great

To see the greatness of God’s love, we only need to look at the cross. John 3:16 says, “For God so loved the world that He gave is only begotten son, that whosoever believeth in Him should not perish but have everlasting life.” Jesus, the sinless son of God, took our place. It should have been us on the cross – but Jesus bore all of our sins on himself and willingly went to the cross so that we could receive God’s forgiveness and accept His mercy. 2 Corinthians 5:21 says, “He made the One [Jesus] who did not know sin to be sin for us, so that we might become the righteousness of God in Him.” As Jesus shed His blood for us, His blood covers all of our sins and God sees us as righteous.

God’s Love is Great, Even while we are still hopelessly lost sinners

Romans 5:8 says, “But God proves His own love for us in that while we were still sinner, Christ died for us.” We often hear stories but soldiers who throw themselves on a grenade to save the platoon or a parent or spouse who steps in front of a bullet. But how often do you hear a story where someone sacrifices their life for their enemy? This is exactly what Jesus did for us. As a lost sinner, we are God’s enemy, but even then Christ loved us enough to die in our place.

Because of God’s rich mercy and great love, He extends grace rather than justice

saved by grace screen bean

If mercy is God not giving us the punishment and justice we deserve, then grace is God giving us blessings we do not deserve. Instead of justice, God extends his favor towards us when we choose to accept his free gift of salvation by faith in Christ. It is only by His grace that we receive the blessing of salvation and eternal life. It is impossible to earn it.

If I should give you a gift, but you want to pay me for it, it ceases to be a gift. If you work for the gift’s value, it ceases to be a gift. And if you refuse and reject it, then it is no longer a gift. It is only a gift when you reach out and accept it. Christ already paid the price for the gift of salvation – with His life – so that once we accept the gift of salvation our sin debt is marked “paid in full” with the very blood that Jesus shed on the cross in our place. The grace God offers, is the unmerited gift of eternal life.

Justice = Dead in Sin or Grace = Alive in Christ

When we accept God’s generous and loving offer of mercy and grace, He makes us alive together with Christ and gives us abundant and eternal life. Instead of being spiritually dead in our sin, God’s grace and mercy makes us a new creation that is now spiritually alive and when we pass on into eternity, there is a place waiting for us in heaven where we will dwell with Christ.

The work of salvation cannot be accomplished by our works. We can’t earn it and we can’t buy it. The entire process of salvation is an act of God’s goodness and only by His unmerited favor and only for His glory. When we truly see ourselves as the sinners we are and the grace and love that God has for us despite our sinfulness, we must then choose to accept or reject His gift of salvation. Accepting it by faith leads to eternal life in heaven with Christ. Rejecting it leads to the justice we deserve – eternal separation from God in hell. What will you choose?

#judgment #revival #bequiet #donotfear

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God, Love, and Marshmallow Wars

What’s Inside God, Love and Marshmallow Wars?

This book includes 365 daily activities and takes you on a guided journey through Biblical principles about Godly marriage that you can then apply to your marriage, as well as helping you talk through concepts that can help you develop a solid relationship. Inside you will find simple, quick activities that include:

  • Scripture to memorize and meditate on
  • Conversation Starters
  • Concepts from the Bible on Godly marriages
  • Romance Builders
  • Relationship Builders
  • Personal reflections
  • Date ideas
  • Group date ideas for you and other Christian couples

Available in hardback, paperback and ebook from Westbow Press Bookstore, Christian Book Distributors, Amazon, and Barnes & Nobel. Click the icons below to purchase from your preferred bookstore. Now also available at WalMart online.

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 Join the community of couples on Facebook who are committed to intentionally growing their marriage and learning how to have a marriage that honors God. Here you can post photos of the different activities as you do them, ask questions of other couples, share how God is using this book to strengthen your marriage, and grow with other Christian couples. We’ll see you in the community.

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God’s Design for Glorious Living. (Ephesians 1:11-12)

Inheritance of the Children of God

Have you ever thought about the idea that you were created for glorious living? Ephesians 1:3-14 gives praise to God for the blessing He has provided. Throughout these verses, Paul ties together the ideas of predestination, God’s glory, salvation, and the inheritance we have as children of God. Our inheritance is two-fold. First is becoming a child of God, which gives us a right to expect an inheritance. Second is spending eternity in heaven and dwelling in the presence of God.

Because we are His children, we are blessed because God chose to save us but that salvation came at a great cost to Jesus. Because Jesus paid the price for our sins on the cross and because we are Children of God, we can have confidence that God will bring us to heaven to spend eternity with Him just as he promised. However, we were not meant to have just a glorious, eternal life. God’s design was for us to have a glorious life here on earth too.

God Planned a Glorious Life

Have you ever thought about the idea that God planned a glorious life for us? He planned every detail about us: the family we’d belong to, our DNA, our personality. You are not here by chance. You do not live in this moment of time by chance. God places everyone of us exactly where and when He wants us to be. He gifted each of to fulfill His plans that would bring Him honor and glory.

In fact, the human race was God’s most glorious moment of creation. It was the only thing created in which God says, “it was very good.” God created Adam and Even and placed them in the Garden of Eden – the perfect couple in a perfect garden. God even came by every evening to visit with them. But then they sinned and were banished from the garden. God intended for us to have a glorious life – but we messed that up. Yet, still we can experience an abundant, joyful, glorious life in Christ.

So much of happiness in life seems to be dependent other people, more money, the next promotion, the perfect kids, etc. But all of these will eventually let you down. Only salvation, by faith, through grace will give the fruits of the Holy Spirit that include love, joy, and peace. When we make Christ our Savior, we can live a glorious life knowing that the author and finisher of our faith will be faithful to do exceedingly abundantly above all we can think or ask when we keep our hearts and minds aligned within His will.

Predestined

Just as God planned out every detail about who you are, he planned out every detail about your salvation. You did not become a Christian by chance or coercion or unaided choice, but by the enabling of God’s Spirit. The word “predestined” (found in verse 11) means “determining beforehand,” “deciding ahead of time.” So, God determines certain things to occur ahead of time.

Romans 8:29-30 tells us that God predetermined that certain individuals would be conformed to the likeness of His Son, be called, justified, and glorified. At the same time, the Bible says in John 3:16 and Romans 10:9-10 that we all have a choice. So then, somehow, in the mystery of God, predestination works hand-in-hand with a person being drawn by God to salvation. As such, He has a very specific plan just for you. Long before you ever heard about Christ, in fact before the earth was formed, God planned this moment in your life. It is no accident that you are reading this verse on this website right this very moment. And long before you knew about Him, he had his eye on you with a purpose that He is right this very moment working out in you.

Purpose and Meaning of Life

It is only in a relationship with Christ that we can truly find out who we are and why we exist. Life only has purpose and meaning when we develop passionate relationships with Christ and live our lives aligned to His will in every way. Then we bring Him honor and glory. Then we are able to discover the glorious and abundant life that is God’s absolute best for each one of us.

#judgment #revival #bequiet #donotfear

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It’s Fall Y’all!
Cutest ‘lil pumpkin

Here are some of our favorite designs:

  • Revive Us Again, Lord

God, Love, and Marshmallow Wars

What’s Inside God, Love and Marshmallow Wars?

This book includes 365 daily activities and takes you on a guided journey through Biblical principles about Godly marriage that you can then apply to your marriage, as well as helping you talk through concepts that can help you develop a solid relationship. Inside you will find simple, quick activities that include:

  • Scripture to memorize and meditate on
  • Conversation Starters
  • Concepts from the Bible on Godly marriages
  • Romance Builders
  • Relationship Builders
  • Personal reflections
  • Date ideas
  • Group date ideas for you and other Christian couples

Available in hardback, paperback and ebook from Westbow Press Bookstore, Christian Book Distributors, Amazon, and Barnes & Nobel. Click the icons below to purchase from your preferred bookstore. Now also available at WalMart online.

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 Join the community of couples on Facebook who are committed to intentionally growing their marriage and learning how to have a marriage that honors God. Here you can post photos of the different activities as you do them, ask questions of other couples, share how God is using this book to strengthen your marriage, and grow with other Christian couples. We’ll see you in the community.

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Be Quiet. Do not fear. (Isaiah 7:4)

Politics in Isaiah’s Day

During the days of the prophet Isaiah, the political situation was tense in Jerusalem. In the early 730s B.C. Tiglath-Pileser III, king of Assyria, was busy on his northern frontier. At the same time, Rezin, king of Syria and Pekah, king of Israel, combined forces to withstand the expected attack from Assyria as soon the they were done in the north. Rezin and Pekah wanted Ahaz, king of Judah to join them, but Ahaz wanted nothing to do with them. So Rezin and Pekah plot to remove Ahaz from the throne and put a puppet king on the throne who they would be able to manipulate and control. With all that going on, God steps into the chaos and tells Ahaz to be quiet and to not fear.

God Interrupt’s Ahaz’ plans

Ahaz was contemplating paying the Assyrians to rescue him from Rezin and Pekah but God steps in and sends His prophet Isaiah to deliver a message. God says, “Go out now to meet Ahaz, you and Shear-Jashub your son, at the end of the aqueduct from the upper pool, on the highway to the Fuller’s Field, and say to him: “Take heed, and be quiet; do not fear or be fainthearted.” Ahaz had no need to worry. God said that none of what was planned would come to pass and their plans would not stand. Isaiah’s message from God would challenge the king to consider what the source of his trust was: Yahweh or the Assyrians. The All-knowing God was in control and if Ahaz would not trust God, God said he would not be established (vs. 9)

Who is your “Rezin and Pekah”?

All of us have times where there is a “Rezin and Pekah” breathing down our backs, trying to manipulate us to do what they want. We all have some big, bad “Assyrian King” that wants nothing more than to destroy us, take us captive, or even kill us. Maybe your “Rezin and Pekah” is a co-worker, or even a boss, that wants you to break a company policy. Maybe your “Assyrian King” comes in the form of a politician with a new law he wants to pass or maybe its a diagnosis from a doctor.

Politics today

Around the world today, politics grow more and more intense, maybe even scary. Sometimes it comes down to voting for the “lesser evil” because there really just isn’t a God-honoring candidate running. It seems each year we see more and more of stamping God out of the world and moving away from Christian values and morals. Instead of peace and unity, there is discord, strife, and division. Without a revival, our world is spinning faster and faster toward God’s final judgment. Today’s world isn’t really much different that Israel and Judah or even Sodom and Gomorrah. Without revival, judgment is just around the corner.

Be quiet; do not fear

Whatever threats are in your life, God says, “Take heed, and be quiet; do not fear or be fainthearted.”

Take heed

To “take heed” means to pay attention or to take notice of. We need to pay attention to the events of our world. We also need to pay attention to what happened to Isreal and Judah because of the unwillingness to repent and return to God. Why? Because we can learn from their mistakes. We can repent, invite the Holy Spirit back into our nation and watch Him bring revival to our world. Lastly, we need to pay attention to end-time prophecies and understand how the events of our world fall into line with those prophecies.

Be quiet

It is so easy to get caught up in the rush of moment by moment – always running behind, trying to get the next thing done. But God wants us to just be quiet. In the quiet, we can hear the still small voice speaking to us. In the quiet, we can rest. It is in the quiet, we can dwell on the things of God. And in the quiet we reconnect with Him and draw closer to Him.

Do not fear

Sometimes it seems impossible to not be afraid of things going on in our world. However, God is in control. His promises are true. We can live in peace when we surrender our hearts to Him and trust that He will work all things out for our good – even when we can’t understand what’s happening. He has good plans for us.

Isaiah 26:3 says, “You keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on you, because he trusts in you.” And Isaiah 43:2 says, “When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and through the rivers, they shall not overwhelm you; when you walk through fire you shall not be burned, and the flame shall not consume you.

God has promised to never leave or forsake us, so no matter what happens in our world today, God is never surprised or unprepared for it and He is there with us.

Isaiah’s challenge

The same All-knowing God that was in control in Ahaz’s life is in control of your life. Isaiah issues the same challenge to you today: Will you trust God? Will you choose to believe Jeremiah 29:11 that says that God has good plans for us? Even if the threat occurs, we can know that God is in control. He goes before us. He walks beside us. God is there. He is near. He will never leave us or forsake us. So be quiet. Stop worrying. Do not fear. Don’t be fainthearted. God is still on His throne and He has you in the palm of His hand.

#judgment #revival #bequiet #donotfear

Revive Renew Redeem logo

New in the shop this week:

Thankful Plaid Pumpkin

Our Fall Designs

Fall for Jesus – He never leaves
It’s Fall Y’all!
Cutest ‘lil pumpkin

Here are some of our favorite designs:

  • Revive Us Again, Lord

God, Love, and Marshmallow Wars

What’s Inside God, Love and Marshmallow Wars?

This book includes 365 daily activities and takes you on a guided journey through Biblical principles about Godly marriage that you can then apply to your marriage, as well as helping you talk through concepts that can help you develop a solid relationship. Inside you will find simple, quick activities that include:

  • Scripture to memorize and meditate on
  • Conversation Starters
  • Concepts from the Bible on Godly marriages
  • Romance Builders
  • Relationship Builders
  • Personal reflections
  • Date ideas
  • Group date ideas for you and other Christian couples

Available in hardback, paperback and ebook from Westbow Press Bookstore, Christian Book Distributors, Amazon, and Barnes & Nobel. Click the icons below to purchase from your preferred bookstore. Now also available at WalMart online.

Westbow logo
Christian book logo
amazon logo
Barnes and Nobel logo
walmart logo


 Join the community of couples on Facebook who are committed to intentionally growing their marriage and learning how to have a marriage that honors God. Here you can post photos of the different activities as you do them, ask questions of other couples, share how God is using this book to strengthen your marriage, and grow with other Christian couples. We’ll see you in the community.

Bible Studies, Bibles, Books & More

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Everything Christian for less!

Looking for a Bible Study, Bible, book or Christian gift? We are an affiliate with Christianbook Distributors and receive an 8% commission on any item purchased through one of our links. However, the commission never increases your cost of any item. View some of our favorite items by clicking on the logo and thank you for supporting our ministry.

Christianbook Distributors Search:
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Enjoy Life With Your Wife (Ecclesiastes 9:9)

To enjoy life, we must accept and stay within the boundaries God gives

The book of Ecclesiastes shows us that since we and our works are destined to perish, we must not waste our lives trying to justify our existence with pursuits that ultimately mean nothing. It examines major efforts of life in light of the reality that we all – eventually – die and warns us the  pursuit of intellectual accomplishments, wealth and luxury, politics, and religion. But it also recommends that we fear God and enjoy life. But in enjoying life comes with boundaries and in Ecclesiastes 9:9, Solomon gives wise instructions to husbands when he tells them to enjoy life with their wife.

To husbands, Solomon says, “Enjoy life with the wife you love all the days of your futile life.” When he talk about life being “futile,” he does not mean worthless, but because our lives are like a vapor, it is fleeting and temporary. For Ecclesiastes 9:9, Solomon is saying, “Since you only live for so long, enjoy life with the wife you love” and when he says “enjoy life” – he means in the full sense of “and Adam knew his wife Eve.”

“Enjoy life with your wife” means just what you think it means

Yes, Solomon is saying that you should find sexual pleasure with her. Paul said in 1 Corinthians 7:3-5, “A husband should fulfill his marital responsibility to his wife, and likewise a wife to her husband. A wife does not have the right over her own body, but her husband does In the same way, a husband does not have the right over his own body, but his wife does. Do not deprive one another sexually — except when you agree for a time, to devote yourselves to prayer. Then come together again; otherwise, Satan may tempt you because of your lack of self-control.”

Paul also in Ephesians 5:25 that husbands are to love their wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave Himself for her. And then in verse 28 he wrote that husbands are to love their wives as their own bodies. Sexual intimacy in marriage should be an expression of the love you share. However, it is not the only way to express your feelings to your wife. Here are seven other ways to show her you love her.

Enjoy life with your wife through your actions towards her

Love her through your actions. There is a reason that people say, “When momma ain’t happy, aint nobody happy.” So if you want to enjoy life with your wife, be sure your actions are a demonstration of the love you have for her.

The word “love” is a verb – it’s an action. It’s what you do. But it’s also how you do it. Colossians 3:19 says, “Husbands, love your wives and do not be harsh with them” If you are to love her as Christ loved the Church, then your actions should mirror Christ’s. Your actions should always be kind and considerate. You can tell your wife you love her a thousand times a day, but if your actions don’t show it, she will never believe your words.

Enjoy life with your wife through consideration and respect

In 1 Peter 3:7, Paul writes, “Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you in the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers.”

Being considerate means doing things for her – like doing the dishes or opening the door for her. Respecting her means you speak to her and about her as your equal because she is a co-heir in eternal life. She is not inferior to you. When Paul says the wife is the weaker partner, he was referring to physical strength. So, even if you both work outside of the home, use that brawn and strength God gave you to take some of her heavy load off her shoulders.

You can also demonstrate consideration by thanking her for what she does to keep your home neat and tidy – and don’t be part of the problem in it getting messy again.

Enjoy life with your wife through loving her as you love yourself

Ephesians 5:28 says: “In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself.” The same way you take care of yourself is the way you should care for her. It’s treating her the way you would want to be treated.

Enjoy life with your wife through spending time with her

Love her by spending time with her. Instead of watching the game on TV, take her out to a memorable place that is special to the two of you. Go hiking together, take a walk on the beach at sunset or enjoy a picnic. Solomon advised that husband enjoy life with their wife because life is so short. We never know when the end of life will come so spend the time with her now. You may never get another chance to take that dream vacation, renew your wedding vows, or check of your bucket list. Never stop dating her. Don’t put it off. Spend time with her now.

Enjoy life with your wife by being faithful

Love her by being faithful. On your wedding day you made a vow to her and to God that you would love her (and only her) until death separates you. God considers adultery a very serious sin. There is no compromise. You can’t flirt with another woman, but claim to be faithful as long as you don’t touch her. In Matthew 5:28, Jesus said, “everyone who looks at a woman to lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart.”

This includes pornography. In today’s world with technology advancing all the time, it would also include virtual reality and programs that allow you to pretend to be another person and interact with people all over the globe in a virtual world.

Adultery, whether the physical act, or just lusting in your heart, destroys families. Even if it does not lead to divorce, the trust is broken and the relationship is never the same.  Paul wrote in Ephesians 5:3, “But among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality.” Being faithful to your wife leaves no from for even a hint of sexual misconduct of any kind.

Enjoy life with your wife by loving her like Christ loves her

God appointed husbands to be the head of household and Christ to be the head of the man. In this role, the husband is the spiritual leader of the home. Ephesians 5:25-28 describes what being a spiritual leader means. Paul wrote in these verses, “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless.” That’s a tall order!

The only possible way for husbands to achieve this is through the help of the Holy Spirit. Not only did Christ give his life for the church, he also came to serve and demonstrated it through washing the disciples feet. He forgave even when he was being nailed to a cross. He offers mercy and grace. Jesus gave Himself up for us and so husbands must give up themselves for their wives, including his own interests. If your wife is having a difficult time submitting to your leadership, then you might want to check and see if you are loving her like Christ, because if you are, she will have no trouble with Biblical submission.

Enjoy life with your wife by following 1 Corinthians 13:4-8.

Demonstrate a 1 Corinthians 13 love. In verses 4-8, we find that love is patient, kind, does not envy, is not boastful or conceited, does not act improperly, is not selfish or provoked, does not keep a record of wrongs, rejoices in the truth, bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things and it never ends.

Enjoy life with your wife by being intentional and determined

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You can’t be passive and enjoy life with her. If you need ideas of ways to intentionally love your wife, grab a copy of my book, “God, Love, and Marshmallow Wars.” This book has 365 activities to help you intentionally love each other. See the information on the book below along with links to purchase a copy.

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God, Love, and Marshmallow Wars

What’s Inside God, Love and Marshmallow Wars?

This book includes 365 daily activities and takes you on a guided journey through Biblical principles about Godly marriage that you can then apply to your marriage, as well as helping you talk through concepts that can help you develop a solid relationship. Inside you will find simple, quick activities that include:

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Available in hardback, paperback and ebook from Westbow Press Bookstore, Christian Book Distributors, Amazon, and Barnes & Nobel. Click the icons below to purchase from your preferred bookstore. Now also available at WalMart online.

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 Join the community of couples on Facebook who are committed to intentionally growing their marriage and learning how to have a marriage that honors God. Here you can post photos of the different activities as you do them, ask questions of other couples, share how God is using this book to strengthen your marriage, and grow with other Christian couples. We’ll see you in the community.

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