Tag: faith & Marriage

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Couple Challenge: Faith & Marriage

298

Fear can destroy love and marriages. Satan is at the root of all fear, but we experience fear from many facets of life including past hurts, disappointments, unknowns, illnesses, finances, job loss and more. Fear is something that feeds, breeds, and spreads. The good news is that faith and love destroy fear. The Bible says, “Perfect love casts out fear” (1 John 4:18, NKJV). God told Joshua not to be afraid because He would be with him wherever he went. (Joshua 1:9) David wrote in Psalm 56:3-4 that whenever he was afraid he put his trust in God. God tells us: “Do not fear, for I am with you;
do not be afraid, for I am your God. I will strengthen you; I will help you; I will hold on to you with My righteous right hand.” (Isaiah 41:10) Where there is unconditional love and faith in God, fear has no room to fester and spread. Take time to talk to each other about any fears you have and then pray about them. Look up Bible verses about fear and anytime you feel fear creeping in, say those verses out loud.

There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear, because fear involves torment. But he who fears has not been made perfect in love. — 1 John 4:18 (NKJV)

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Couple Challenge: Faith & Marriage

291

Proverbs 18:21 tells us that both life and death are in the power of the tongue. To anyone that says “sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me” only makes me want to reply with “liar, liar, pants on fire!” Words do hurt, and they can cause extreme emotional pain. The more often we hear the same words over and over, the more likely we are to believe them. We begin to set our personal identity in the words we hear about ourselves. With just a few words, we can make someone’s day or shred them to pieces. Words can breed anger, resentment, and hatred or they can grow faith, trust, and love. What words are you saying to each other, especially when you are angry with each other? Commit to using words that build each other up and strengthen the bond of your marriage.

Life and death are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it will eat its fruit.
 —Proverbs 18:21

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Couple Challenge: Faith & Marriage

284

Talk about what it means to genuinely care about someone. What are some examples of how you can demonstrate you care about your spouse? It might mean that when your spouse is talking to you, you take the time to stop what you are doing, make eye contact, and actively listen to what he/she is saying. It might mean that you take care of him/her when they are ill. It might mean caring about the problems or struggles they are facing and give support and encouragement, praying for them and demonstrating empathy. Talk to each other about what your spouse can do to show they genuinely care about you.

If anyone has this world’s goods and sees his brother in need but closes his eyes to his need – how can God’s love reside in him? — 1 John 3:17

 

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Couple Challenge: Faith & Marriage

277

A Christian marriage is the uniting of two imperfect sinners. Successful marriages require more than romance, shared interests, and mutual attractions. If this is all your marriage is based on, then what happens when there are problems and nothing seems to change? These things don’t provide stability for marriages to continue through difficult times. The stability comes through Biblical submission to each other and to God, which is how He designed marriage to work. When we understand Biblical submission and follow God’s design for marriage, then we can find stability even through the difficulties that come our way.

Wives, submit to your own husbands as to the Lord, for the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church. Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave Himself for her. — Ephesians 5:22-23, 25

 

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Couple Challenge: Faith & Marriage

270

The Bible tells us that when we judge others, we set the standard for how God will judge us. Jesus said in Matthew 7:1-5 that we need to get rid of the log in our eye before we try to remove the speck from someone else’s eye. In fact, Jesus says we’re hypocrites when we do this. Whenever you catch yourself finding fault, stop and look at your own faults. Get alone with God and ask Him to show you where you are at fault. You might just find that God keeps you busy enough getting those logs out of your eye that you won’t be able to see the speck in your spouse’s eye.

Or how can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ and look, there’s a log in your eye? Hypocrite! First, take the log out of your eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your brother’s eye.” — Matthew 7:4-5